One of the blogs I read or emails I get or something the other day said something about how they were resolved to always getting through their to do list without sacrificing their health, and that they nearly always manage to make that happen. I think that sounds great. But I also, in my deepest heart, feel like that's a pipe dream. My family is a project family. We bond over projects: building trebuchets, re-doing a room in the house, putting in floors or tile or sod. It's what we do. But we, most of us, also feel perfectly OK and maybe even drawn to taking on big projects, like the Christmas Benefit/Children's Musical my mom and I put together this season. And then Christmas itself is always a big Ta-Dah! From the lights to the garlands to the gifts. I even tend to go big with my ideas for traditions.
Anyway, the point is, I'm questioning whether the whole idea of making health the top priority on the to do list is viable for me AND whether I should believe it is viable or not. Because part of me thinks it just isn't possible to do some of the amazing and fulfilling things I have done with out a little sacrifice, without being OK with a little extra stress to turn out something special, like the musical. Some things are a lot of work and some stress, but that doesn't mean we shouldn't do them, right?
For example, getting Christmas on the last few days has required all my focus the last few days, especially as I'm a bit under the weather. Even now, I know that I can't get it all done in time and it pains me, really makes me sad for the meaningful things that I want to do for others. And even in the process of doing what I'm trying to do, I haven't done my health things, besides eat well. Not a lot of movement or stretching over here the last few days. In fact, Sunday I spent 4 hours working on my computer at an odd angle in bed because I was too dizzy to stand for very long so I could complete the Christmas gifts I had promised to the class of girls I teach in school. Trust me, these were important, meaningful, worth it things I was making them. But still, I was all kinky for the rest of the day and today, even. True, I waited to the last minute...
Anyway, I'm just thinking through it all here and arguing with myself. But, I would assume the benefits of having a more paced and less self-sacrificing approach to how I give my time would be similar to the effects of when I gave up all-nighters at the end of under-grad, or going to bed on time regularly, or honoring the Sabbath: more daily energy, more focused and clear abilities, and happier attitude through out. I need to define what health investments are too costly to give up and get stubborn about it. I need to change my paradigm so that I don't rob Health to pay Life. or something.
Sounds like a New Year's Resolution in the making, eh?
With that, it's bedtime. 'night.
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